Monday, April 6, 2009

Calloused Knees

The Lord upholds all who are falling
And raises up all who are bowed down.

Psalm 145:14

Date notations in my Bible clue me in as to the state of my life at the time. It’s always interesting to cast my mind back to the time period listed. Sometimes I have difficulty even remembering the events that took place but the verse itself gives some indication as to where I was on my spiritual growth chart.

Today’s verse reminds me of the time I was flat on my face. The life I had envisioned had disintegrated and I was face to face with the dirt. All day long God heard my plaintive bleats. It didn’t feel as though I was being upheld or raised up.
But, hindsight is valuable. That fact that I am able to write today is evidence that the Lord does raise up all who are bowed down. The sands that I slogged through for months have brought me, today, to a wide and spacious place.

It turns out that what appeared to be the end was actually the beginning. The darkness that enveloped me was what ultimately allowed me to see the light. Loss of dreams produced a clean canvas on which God’s vision was painted.

This was not what I saw at the time but in reflecting back I remember early morning hours of prayer. One day passing into the next and discovering that instead of being on my face I was on my knees. And I find that it’s a good place to be. Besides, hopefully, the next time I won’t have so far to “fall.”

Jesus, thank you for the press of your hand
on my back—leading, guiding. I want to stay on my knees
in this wide and spacious place.

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